Sunday, October 05, 2008

The Squirt Gun Assassins

I already know what I'm doing next September. That's when New York's next big Street Wars tournament starts. On day one of the tournament, contestants are led to a secret Chinatown location where every participant is given a file containing a picture and some key information about another New Yorker. The mission: Dispose of that person as quickly and efficiently as possible. Your only weapons: Squirt guns and water balloons. The reward: $500 and everlasting glory.

It sounds awesome. I love the idea of stalking teenagers and little old ladies, patiently waiting for them to emerge from the safety of their apartments. Then I would leap into action, drenching them with refreshing New York City tap water. What could be better?

Read about this year's competition here!

(Below: One of this year's assassins. Photo by David Goldman for the New York Times.)


Anonymous Hazel said...

I NEED to move to N.Y.C.! That's so cool! But don't people mind having their information handed out like that? Or do you sign up?

12:19 PM  
Anonymous nellie said...


12:31 PM  
Blogger Jin Ai said...

oh. my. god.
that is awesome.
Except I can't get to the NYT article D: Can I find it somewhere else?
It's like this game my friend started at my school called Blammo, where you're given a spoon and a target, and if your target isn't holding their spoon with a voluntary muscle, you can blammo them by hitting them lightly with the spoon and saying "blammo." :D:D
I really want to join, but it's kind of scary/creepy....

3:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, that almost makes me want to move to New York. Almost, but not quite. Too crowded, too dirty. But that sounds really cool and like loads of fun. Possibly even oodles of fun. :D Please, if you are reading this, visit and vote for my shirt! Even if you don't like it, please vote that you do. If you click on The Brief at the top of the page, you can learn more about the contest and the prize. :)

3:37 PM  
Blogger Jin Ai said...

anonymous: could you not advertise your shirt after every comment? It gets annoying.
And hey, don't insult the greatest city on Earth!

I read the first page of the NYT article (it won't let me get to the second! D:) and it seems like it's basically like the game Killer, with water guns, safe zones and without condoning players' breaking laws. Unfortunately, you have to be above 18, and pay $45 to get in. *sigh* I'll stick to Blammo for now.
It's much less scary ._. lol.

6:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Once again, I MUST move to new york!!!!!! Kirsten, I have high expectations for you. I bet all of my cash that you will be next years winner.

6:30 PM  
Anonymous undiscovered universe said...

OMG! That is so awesome!!!!!!
Must move to NYC!!!

7:58 PM  
Blogger Kitty said...

hm... Maybe I'll go to NY then... Jin Ai: Kiki Srike skills! *D [lolz] If it's really fun, $45 will be worth it!

8:04 PM  
Blogger Arsenic said...

Oh...WOW!!!!!! How does one enter this contest, oh Great Bringer Of Insanely Awesome Information? I MUST ENTER!!!!

8:35 PM  
Anonymous eternal espionage said...

Heck to the Yes! Do you know if they have one of those in Texas?!!!

9:27 PM  
Anonymous Irregular Kiki said...

WHY ARE ALL THE GOOD THINGS IN NYC?? :[ I love water fights. New Years Eve this year was 40 degrees and people were THROWN into the pool fully dressed with around five people carrying one person at a time, water bombs included in the activity. Boy, were there stuffed up mobiles or what?!

8:21 AM  
Anonymous KieL said...

THAT"S EPIC!!! my friend's sister's grade 10 class did that too, except that your target was someone else who was playing. sounds awesome! but one question, how would anyone know if you're lying if you said you got your target???

8:53 PM  
Anonymous Cupcakedoll said...

kiel: you have to bring your dripping wet target back to base to prove it! Then everyone can take pictures and dump more water on the person! <---I totally just made that up. Probably since everyone signs up to participate they're good sports and admit they got gotten.

But what if you squirt the wrong person?! Some poor innocent soul walkin' down the street and SPLOOSH! I'd like to see videos of that and the apology! Hehehe.

10:16 PM  
Anonymous Michele said...

OMG No fair! I want to live in NYC. :( Have fun! I'm sure it'll be so much fun haha.

11:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's amazing! I am so jealous! :D:D:D wow. I read the whole article, it gets pretty dramatic.

1:28 PM  
Blogger liltomboyblue11;) said...

again, it was me, i was the one who said the article got dramatic.

6:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ok then

7:41 AM  

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